Another post on the same day.....

Nothing much, just wanted to come here and pour out a bit of my ambivalence toward that so-called special someone, not literally but, at least after years of being a single. I have always been very cautious about people of whom I find to be intelligent and humorous because I tend to get close to this type of person. Well, guess I am a pretty quiet and boring person who does not have a really colorful life despite the fact that I have been in this big city for years that many people have wanted to live in.

I was actually invited to go over to this special someone's apt tonight but somehow I was told at the eleventh hour that we might have to do it another time. I was really well prepared to get closer to this person tonight but that message came as a warning to me that I should keep a distance and hold back a little. I know I have always been pretty in control of almost everything in life but not quite when it comes to a relationship nonetheless. I guess having great times matters most in a "relationship" of its kind. No, we never talked about being an item whatsoever. The gestures, intimacy and conversations we've had and I knew it instinctively that we are pretty close and just steps away from becoming an item. No I am not desperate for love but no one would resist the temptation, would you?

I've learnt to be strong after the previous heartbreaking moments that lasted months. That's why I never been out hunting for love even though I have implicit faith in myself. Love is a mutual feeling and it is hard to find but not impossible. Well, well I am feeling much better now after letting it out (just like someone in the asylum talking to the wall..hehe). May still need something to knock me out tonight ;o) Cheers!

On Tuesday at 10pm est